As I sit here writing this, the tears are steadily streaming down my face – tears of guilt, of feeling like I’m letting down someone who loves me.
Up until last week, I was regularly attending church on a Sunday with my aunt. Today I made the jump to finally tell her that I needed to take a break and step back from church to focus on my mental health and getting better and I suppose to figure out what the right path in life is for me.
What might seem like a minor thing – waiting on a text message – is torture for a mind like mine, that sees the worst in every situation. I hate letting people down, if they ask me to do something, I’ll say yes, even if I don’t want to do it as I can’t stand disappointing people. It’s like I have to make them happy.